Pain and Photography

October 09, 2024  •  Leave a Comment

HELLO one and all!

It’s been a long time since I’ve done any bloging, and I’ve been saying that I’m going to catch up and go over my issues over the last couple of years.  And post a blog identifying those issues.  And of course by lazy mind and my physical limitations.  But I will now proceed and I will try to keep it as brief as possible.

In November of 2021 and I slipped on some ice while I was working in a my other job, because photography does not provide enough funds you know, to live.  I do like to tell people it is an artistic endeavor, and I truly believe it is so poverty is a common feature.  But back to the story, it’s slipping on ice at work.  I was compensated rather quickly but for some strange unknown reason (I was some to find out) I was unable to walk at all with out crutches within months.  I was totally incapacitated what I thought was from my waist down.  I was soon to find out it was far more serious!  Long story short time so I actually broke my back as well and in the process of the surgery to repair my broken back they found a tumor.  And this tumor was actually doing some damage to my spinal cord and inhibiting my ability to walk or controlled those functions that dignity will not allow me to point out.  Fun times at Drewmayphotography.

This wasn’t fun as you can imagine but I did find myself realizing is that I have mortality and I’d better do some things and I like to do it for this cancer takes my life.  This process helped me made the decision to switch camer Brands.  I went from my beloved Canon 5DSR and all the excellent lenses that I had collected.  To the Fujifilm GFX system.  I’ve always wanted to go medium format as a landscape photographer since digital started.  I had medium format in the early digital days and I always wanted to return but funds always where not their.

So with if the injuries and the repeated cancer treatments I find myself very weak and I have some serious back issues that affect my ability to capture images.  I am slowly getting stronger and I’m doing my best to improve my vision with this new camera.  I will say it has been a slight learning curve but I would say it’s not been tremendously different except for the quality of the digital image.  And there it has been a massive change!  The big problem that I find is that encourages me to look at other types of camera.  I have been eyeing 4X5 with great interest and this can only be dangerous as film is only increasing in price.

I will completey admit that the first two years of this camera have been really difficult for me to find enthusiasm and to not fall in the ditch, or stumble on the rocks in a stream.  I will say it’s affected my composition and I’ve tried my best to correct that.  I honestly say that I’m starting to feel comfort with the camera and I’m starting to find locations that make me a little more enthusiastic.  I decided that this year I wouldn’t go to the mountains at all.  I needed to explore my local area to see if I could find things and compositions that would interest me.  It’s taken me a little while, mostly because I have felt that the area that I have lived in for the last 50 some odd years, is not that photographically exciting.  Five years ago I would make that a challenge and do everything in my power to prove myself wrong.  But with my sickness and my physical limitations on top of my enthusiasm gap I have found it very difficult to push myself.

This is very common feature for all creative’s we have moments of trials and tribulations and mental distention I like to call it.  That make it difficult for us to find anything that we consider attractive enough for a photograph.  In the days of film this was a very common thing because you just didn’t want to spend the money, but this is digital and I just didn’t want to spend time editing.  That comes from the reality that th I find it very difficult to sit and a computer chair in front of my computer, without suffering substantive pain and an extreme difficulty to stand.  I am doing my best to extend my stays in front of my computer and consuming morphine to deal with the pain.

Now I think that’s sufficient complaining about my medical issues, they will (the medical issues) remain a common feature affecting my photography and I will be suffering some consequences.  So beyond that factor I will do my utmost to add a few images from here to there and try to improve by physical body so however many more years I am allowed to remain on this planet I can hopefully leave something that somebody finds attractive.  So it’s all about the art I will do my best to create it and I hope that you as my audience find pleasure in viewing it.

Fairydell - Drew May 30-08-24 _DSF1531-Edit-2Fairydell - Drew May 30-08-24 _DSF1531-Edit-2© www.drewmayphotography.com

So in the spirit of a new image theI post this photograph dawn of the field and a lovely storm approaching across that field.  I am going to do my very best to try the see in black and white again because that is the place that I always find the greatest pleasure in photography.  I like black and white because it removes all the extra “stuff” that confuse an image.  It is truly about light and shadow and to me that’s what photography is all about.

Stormy - Drew May 18-05-24 _DSF9476-EditStormy - Drew May 18-05-24 _DSF9476-Edit© www.drewmayphotography.com

Have a most wonderful week enjoy what’s left of the fine weather and we hope the best for our Florida friends!  

 

 


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